Proverbs 27:17 tells us “Iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens his friend’s countenance.”
For years, I avoided accountability from others, especially new friendships or relationships, because I didn’t want to be vulnerable or transparent. I wasn’t ready to let others in and expose them to the pieces of me that I was most ashamed of—the pain, the hurt, the depression, and the negative thoughts of myself. I was fearful of the judgment from others—fearful that I would be perceived as inadequate and worthless. I also wasn’t completely satisfied with where I was at that time of my life and the foolishness I was entertaining, so I was resistant to the push for change that could have come from an accountability partner.
Oh, I was really good at avoiding accountability. I remember avoiding the alter counselor who guided me to my rededication and baptism. She called me a few times to ensure I was on track with my new member classes, and I was less and less receptive to her with each call. Why? Because I wasn’t on track, and her call was a reminder of that. I was also running from the accountability of others because I wanted to do things my way. But I somehow knew my way wasn’t the right way.
But God! Things changed once I began to let a few close friends in, especially my best friend. You’re probably thinking, How could you keep things from your bestie? That’s how the devil works, leading me to think that my bestie might even be judgmental of certain things. And let me tell you, ladies, I have the sweetest best friend ever! In fact, my best friend was in Woman’s Ministry at church and the shift I witnessed in her—through words and actions—led me to want to join the ministry. I wanted to experience that change in my life. Through the ministry, I gained an assigned accountability partner, and I’m truly grateful for her. These ladies helped me to stay on a positive track.
I was also amongst a group of women for 18 months where we were encouraged to be transparent. That was where God processed me to understand the importance of accountability. These women helped me through some very tough times and kept me encouraged toward my destiny. Their prayers, calls, pulse checks, and love were an intricate part of my process to contentment. I’m grateful!